Stories

God and Coffee.

This is a response I give to people every day of my life. 

The question that demands this answer?: 

"How do you survive with twin three year olds and a new baby?????"

Some people lie, tell these perplexed people that they "don't know" or "just do".. But I know you mommies out there and you know i'm right... the answer is always the two most powerful things in the universe.. 

But, seriously.. how do we do it? Even with the help of our spouses, boyfriends, parents, friends, and support groups... How DO we survive. I'm still asking myself that question three years later. 

People often ask me to tell them the best and worst stories of mommy-hood... I have so many, I swear I should write a book. Between pregnancy and the daily dramas of everyday life... I could make millions.. some people who are far more fluent in writing than I have. 

Honestly, though. How could I pick a favorite story? My life is like a comedy in itself! Every day there are new adventures to add to the big book of craziness I call my family story. Between things like poop smeared carpet, permanent marker artwork on the walls, and my brand new makeup destroyed by little 2 year old fingers trying to look like mommy... I pretty much have seen everything. (Did I mention that was all in one day? Yes.. one day.. AND I was 5 months pregnant) The bad stories intertwine with the good.. all becoming stories to laugh at.. eventually (Maybe in 18 years or so for some of them).
But all in all I stick to my motto... God and coffee. 

Sometimes though those two things don't seem to come through. sometimes life is just overwhelming and lame. Sometimes being a mommy becomes too hard or too much. Sometimes all the yelling and screaming and throwing and demanding becomes too unbearable. Sometimes we just need our night to puzzle over our crime dramas and eat as much ice-cream and popcorn as our stomachs can hold. But you know what? That's ok. Because these are the times that we realize how much our kids mean to us, how much they need us. They need us to be covered in spit up and freaking out because one ran off in the grocery store. They need us to argue with them about bedtime and tell them why its important not to lie. These are the things that you might not think much about now, but that they will appreciate years later. 

Ok enough gushy stuff.. this blog is really about trying to explain my mommy methods and who I am a little bit.

I am not a "typical" mom.. I am not super crafty. I don't bake constantly. I can't sew, or paint, or make delicious pot roast. I am not super environmentally conscious and I DO use disposable diapers...  I don't look good in yoga pants. The only reason why I wear sports bras is to be comfy... definitely not to work out. I LOVE chocolate.. and don't care a turtles booty about my figure.. cause if I did I would get sad and then eat more chocolate and get a bigger figure.. so why not enjoy it and not worry! I have two beautiful identical twin daughters who are three years old (for purposes of this blog I will call them SJ and SR). They are smart and funny and ORNERY! I have a son, SD. He is a little over two months old and the easiest baby I have ever taken care of (Thank you Lord). I have a dog who is my other child. His name is Apple Jax. I have a husband who is pretty much my other OTHER child. And Koopa.. our African Tortoise.. who I really can't be ok with calling my child, but we treat him like a dog... and the dog is like my kid... so I guess I shouldn't care. I enjoy coloring, playing music, watching movies, and eating chicken nuggets with the kiddos.. applesauce, too. Disney is pretty much the sun our world revolves around in our house. Cinderella, Rapunzel, Tiana and Mulan are pretty much my best friends, considering I know everything about them, their love lives, and know every song/background chart/line to any and every movie/tv show they have ever been in. I can even tell you that Tiana is left handed... yep.. that's how close we are. Bet you didn't notice that.. watch the movie 45 times a week and you will... Sometimes I wish I were on a beach somewhere soaking up the sun. Then I realize that if I left on vacation for any period of time at all my house would be a mess and nothing would get done. So I settle for opening the blinds.. which is quite a hassle considering that I have to ACTUALLY put on "appropriate"  clothing just in case someone sees me through said window. (I wish I looked good in yoga pants) But above all else, I love my husband and my kids and my dog and my tortoise. I love my life because all these wonderful kooky people who are in it and I wouldn't trade it for the world... 

So that is pretty much all for now.. Tune in next time for some more thrilling me stuff and good conversation :)
Until then, let the prayers and coffee flow my friends!

~Ashleeplusthree